Kitchen Closed, This Heifer Has Had it! Chunky Shelf Sitter is a rustic, wood block cut in the shape of a cow. It reads “Kitchen closed this heifer has had it,” on a dark-washed, slat-wood-look veneer. This country cow with a sassy attitude looks great on a shelf or windowsill in the kitchen, measuring 4.75” high by 7” wide and 1” deep.